Saturday, March 22, 2014

Ateneo Memories

Note: This was an essay I wrote for the Blue Roast souvenir program. The Blue Roast is a get-together of all graduating college seniors of Ateneo de Manila. This is my own "throwback" in commemoration of our college grad that happened in late March 1993. 
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Ateneo AB Communication Batch 1993
I’ll miss the Quad. As freshmen, my friends I would gather at this bench under the big tree. There, Trixie and Penny would stand on the bench and dance the Hawaii Five-O. Triccie would coax Yen and me to accompany her to the noontime mass in the chapel so we could all see a “heavenly sight.” Sometimes, Cynts would bring cards and tell our fortunes. ABelle would be on the lookout while Tania would laugh at how silly we could all be.

Those were the days when we’d sit around and talk, when we’d plan to come to school in dresses the following day.

I’ll miss how the summer leaves would fall from the big trees in the Quad. How I enjoyed to step on the dry, crisp leaves. But I loved to see the leaves fall from the trees; I called that spectacle “snowing leaves” because the leaves were like dancing snowflakes descending to the ground.

I’ll miss the Colayco Hall lobby. The noise. The running. The singing by the Glee Club members and the ACIL barkadas. Here at the Colayco lobby, we planned Philosophy and Theology presentations, devised advertising campaigns and gave birth to a new TV station. I’ll miss the sturdy wooden benches where we napped during breaks. I’ll miss the endearing way Leslie called the entire place the “Lagdameo Lobby.”

I’ll miss life in the orgs. Movie-watching with the young ladies of New Beginnings, cuddling the babies at CRIBS. Hiding from my Research Editors because my articles for The Guidon were late. Talking with Ateneo Archives’ Ditas who was very helpful to me. General Assemblies with meriendas and working for a big project like the National Video Contest. I’ll miss diligent Aegis reps like Annette, Marivic, Paul, Kitten and Bambi.

I’ll miss the Ateneo Rizal Library, particularly the Reference Section. I’ll miss leafing through the old Aegis yearbooks. I’ll miss the comforting hum of the aircon, the whispering of the fellow students who shared the same table with me, and the stern librarians who scolded us when we were a bit noisy. I’ll probably even miss wearing my ID inside the lib.

I’ll miss the conversations that Sandy and I would often have at the lib, of how she’d tell me “Mamaya ka na lang umuwi.” I’d stay and we’d talk more about the things that were important to us.

I’ll miss my favorite teachers.

Like Mrs. Lolly Lacuesta. Through her English classes, I developed an interest in research, a liking for The Beatles, and a passion for self-improvement.

Like Tatay Nim Gonzalez who scared us at the Orientation Seminar by telling us AB Communication freshmen to shift out. But many of us stayed and we discovered that he’s no terror at all.

Like Father Gorospe, S.J. who taught me that real love is paschal in nature: “You must be willing to die to your own selfishness.”

Like Mr. Bobby Guevarra whose passion for social justice is infectious. I am amazed that he remembers the names of his students and I felt guilty whenever he apologized for his “boring” lectures. I will always remember his advice to us to go where we are most needed.

Like Father Nick Cruz, S.J., who taught me to see much more just by watching movies. Like Mark Escaler who inspired me to write long papers for Film Seminar.

And like Dr. Antonette Palma-Angeles who urged me and my classmates in Philosophy to “stop and think.”

I’ll miss the homey atmosphere of the Comm Department. I’ll especially miss MT (Mr. Tony Gallano) who is not only an excellent editor and videographer, but also a great critic and a fine singer.

I’ll miss my friends very much. I won’t see them for a while because we’ll be too busy pursuing our dreams. I’ll miss Kitten’s sweetness, Badje’s knack for finding time to enjoy life (like play tennis) even if life could be hectic. Candy’s patience and Mickey Mouse collection. Manny and Teta and their debates. Tachie’s singing. Penny’s exceptional wit. Sandy’s green apples and interesting stories. Hannah’s support and quiet understanding. Arnie’s updates. Joy’s innocence. JG’s loud laughter. Dong’s good intentions. Leslie and his sandwiches (wrapped in tissue paper and placed inside the plastic of the tasty sandwich bread). Thesis bonding with Maitel, Ebet, Romer and Jam.

I’ll miss Nessa and our conversations at the Bellarmine Bus Stop.

I’ll miss bothering the people at the Department of Student Welfare Services (DSWS) like (Father) Nono, so I could use their typewriter to type my reports and papers.

I’ll miss the masses at the chapel and at the Rizal Mini-Theater.

I’ll miss walking along the path to Gate 3 at 7:00 in the morning. I’ll miss looking up the sky and seeing the morning sun shining through the tree branches.

I’ll miss the sunsets I encounter when I when I head for home.

I’ll miss treading the field across Bellarmine Hall. I hope that the Bellarmine Field will always be open. I hope that a structure will never-ever be built there. I firmly believe that the Ateneo needs open spaces and that the field across Bel deserves to be an open space.  

I’ll miss the comfort and safety of familiar places and things. I’ll yearn for the warmth and company of the people I met at the Ateneo.

I’ll miss all of them. It’s comforting to know that even if we have to move on, the memories will always stay.


Sunday, March 16, 2014

The Magic of Happy-Ever-After


Note: From 1997 to around 2002, I was reviewing films for The Philippine Star. This was my review of the Star Cinema romantic comedy Got 2 Believe directed by Olivia M. Lamasan that appeared in The Philippine Star (coincidentally!) on March 16, 2002. Here’s the link to that review: http://www.philstar.com/entertainment/154050/magic-happy-ever-after. This is my simple tribute to the late Rico Yan who passed away 12 years ago; he would have been 39 years old last March 14. 
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Don’t look now but Philippine cinema has found a new heroine.

She’s the would-be spinster. Four recent movies had for a female lead a single woman faced with the possibility of spending the rest of her life without a partner.

Sharon Cuneta’s character in Pagdating ng Panahon belonged to a family of spinsters. Jolina Magdangal’s perky persona in Kung Ikaw ay Isang Panaginip was a boyfriend-less gal who fell in love with a handsome face on a billboard. In Ikaw Lamang Hanggang Ngayon, Regine Velasquez played a lonely mail sorter who vented her frustration by carving a message on a park bench. And in Got 2 Believe, Claudine Barretto is an eccentric wedding coordinator who dreams of walking down the aisle very soon.

Correct me if I’m wrong, but it seems we haven’t met this much lonely women in such a short time. If attractive, personable women in movies like Sharon Cuneta, Jolina Magdangal, Regine Velasquez, and Claudine Barretto have difficulty finding Mr. Right, what more the regular-looking women in real life?


But back to Got 2 Believe... The story starts with the tempestuous relationship between Toni (played by Claudine), owner of Ever After Wedding Store, and Lorenz (Rico), wedding photographer. Commitment-phobic Lorenz unwittingly photographs Toni during her awkward wedding moments and has her pictures published in a bridal magazine. A crucial assignment prompts Lorenz to seek Toni’s help.

To appease her, Lorenz offers to find Toni a boyfriend. Toni adamantly turns him down. Even if Toni fears ending up an old maid like her aunts, she isn’t about to overlook the humiliation that Lorenz has caused.

But love conquers all and opposites do attract. The girl who believes in "happily ever after" and the guy who doesn’t believe in "forever" are about to find out they’re perfect for each other.

Got 2 Believe is an entertaining love story. It also tastes as sweet as candy. Cinematography has a kind of glistening quality and in almost all of the scenes, the characters are dressed in pastels like fuchsia, aqua, yellow, mint green and purple, lending a hint of fantasy. The only time the picture turns dark is when Lorenz has dreams that reveal his fears, and later, his realizations.




Vhong Navarro, as Lorenz’s assistant, Rudolf, lights up every scene he’s in with his perfect delivery of dialogue and rib-tickling antics. Carlo Muñoz and Nikki Valdez, who play friends and business partners of Toni, have their memorable comic moments as well. Dominic Ochoa may have played the "na-basted" suitor a hundred times before but his take in Got 2 Believe is his most endearing to date. As Perry, a lawyer, Dominic gives new dimension to the phrase "losing with dignity and grace."




Claudine is admirable for letting down her guard and being very "game." In keeping true to the Toni character, Claudine allowed herself to trip, fall on her knees, be dragged across a bowling alley and cry unabashedly. Rico deserves equal praise for playing the wacky situations very well. But in the dramatic scene where Toni confronts Lorenz at his studio and his expression shifts from vulnerable to detached, that moment was among Rico’s finest.




What do I like best about Got 2 Believe? It’s the key. "Huh? What key?" 


In the film, Toni became close to three men. The first was locked out of the wedding store, Toni’s private sanctum, because he left his key. The second gently handed Toni her key just as he was dropping her off from a date. This guy never got a chance to come in. The third was the only one who easily entered the store and the only one who stubbornly clutched the key, refusing to surrender it to Toni. Symbolically, it was guy no. 3 who held the key to Toni’s heart. Pretty special and clever touch, I should say.

As you leave the theater after watching Got 2 Believe, you’ll feel light and giddy and maybe even hopeful. Worried about spending the rest of your life alone? Well, fear not. As the movie shows, whoever you are, even if you’re getting older and nearing the so-called finish line, thin as a reed or plump with illusions of fitting into a sleeveless gown with a high-slit, o kahit makapal ka pa mag-make up... don’t fret, you’ll find true love. Just believe.

Sunday, March 9, 2014

The "Hatid" Factor


Years ago, I couldn’t drive. I tried driving school five times. On a recent visit to the Land Transportation Office (LTO) to get a student permit, the computer clerk said to me after he typed my name, “Ay, ma’am, may record na kayo dito.”
For a while, I was a yearly visitor to the LTO to apply for a driver's permit.

“Oo, nga eh,” I sighed. “Wala kasi akong practice, lagi kong nakakalimutan yung itinuturo sa akin. Kaya ulit ako nang ulit sa driving school. Ulit rin ako nang ulit sa pagkuha ng student permit.”



If I had more resources, both time and money, I would use it to buy a good car, learn to drive, get a license and drive myself. I don’t like imposing on family and friends so I could hitch a ride with them. Gasoline is not cheap. My house or my destination could be out of their way. And sometimes—I might be wrong though—I feel even the slightest hesitation or annoyance when I muster the courage to ask, “Ah, puwede ba akong sumabay?”

On other occasions, I can’t bring myself to enjoy the company and conversation at parties because the venue is inaccessible to public transportation and half of the time I would be wondering to myself, “How will I get home?" 

I definitely don’t want others to feel they need to bring me home. I don’t want to be seen as an obligation. 

So it’s always a pleasant surprise for me when, at the end of a gathering, a new acquaintance would ask me with a smile, “Do you have a way home?” and offer to drive me to a point where I could safely get a ride. And I feel very thankful when the Good Samaritan brings me all the way to my destination.

I’ve been blessed to know many of the latter.

When I was working at the promo department of a movie company, I often accompanied actors and actresses to the TV shows where they promoted their upcoming movies. One time, I booked a then struggling drummer/sidekick to promote a big-name action star’s flick. We met at the sports compound/home-base studio of a noontime show. The sidekick’s wait took longer than the actual interview. After saying his spiel about the movie’s playdate, I thought that we would simply part ways. He would head off to his next appointment and I would ride the taxi back to the office. 

“Saan ka?” he asked.



“Sa office sa Jusmag,” I answered.

He then said,

“Hatid na kita.”



We hardly talked during the 30-minute ride. His onscreen persona was a noisy comic. In the car, he seemed quiet and sad. 

Years later, he became a host of his own noontime show, got involved in many controversies and made enough money to build lavish homes and buy a fleet of vehicles, including a yacht and an airplane. Many negative comments have been said of this brash, loud host but I will always regard him as the fellow who drove me to my office. 



More recently, I interviewed a celebrity whose acting debut was playing a masseuse in a daring film that became the toast of the international filmfest circuit. Handsome, sincere, and very close to his grandmother who raised him. His lola must have raised him well because when our pictorial-interview ended, he also offered to drive me to the publishing company where I worked.

Today, he’s called the teleserye prince and no longer needs to disrobe for a film. He’s proven his talent, and he backs that up with a good character.

I find it odd whenever people that I am not close to would offer rides. Like the doctor to the barrio (another interviewee) who immediately volunteered to drive me home when I met him in Paco, Manila. He retold his experiences as a volunteer provincial health officer while he drove me to my residence in Quezon City. He even willingly took a side trip to Loyola Heights so I could deliver a letter to my college teacher.



A film director-friend who I rarely see brought me home after an event in Makati. During the hour-long drive, he happily related how he fell in love again and persisted in courting a colleague after numerous rejections. Of course, his efforts paid off. In spite of his tough demeanor—and the bold movies he’s made—this guy’s really a “softie,” a romantic and a real gentleman.

I find it a bit odd that the ones I am close to are more hesitant to offer me a ride. Maybe for good reason?  

There was a guy I was crushing on. I listened when he wanted to talk about his problems. I tried to be supportive when he was in between jobs. During one night out, he suddenly invited a female friend of his to join us. That was fine with me. What got my ire was when he asked me, “Okay lang sa iyo kung ihatid natin siya?” That coming from a guy who never even accompanied me to get a taxi or hailed a taxi for me. 

Maybe it was his indirect way of telling me he didn’t feel the way I did for him.

I’ve asked myself why this “hatid” issue is a big deal to me. I realized it’s connected to my father who passed away in 2008. I wasn’t close to my dad. Yet for all his weaknesses and undesirable traits, he always drove for me. He took me to and from school; he brought me to my high school parties and events, and my activities and meetings for our high school paper.

My dad was not expressive. He was a man of few words. But he always drove for my siblings, my mom and me. That is one fact I always hold on to. I’d like to think that in spite of my dad’s weaknesses, he really loved us because he drove for us.

In as much as I shouldn’t, I’ve made this concept of “hatid” a yardstick of kindness and care. I know it’s unfair because people have their reasons for not giving me a ride. I should not feel bad if they don’t give me a ride since love and care can be shown in other ways.

That’s what I tried telling myself when a friend of mine refused to drive me home, even if my residence was only a 20-minute drive from his.

You see, I helped this friend a lot and I was there when he needed someone the most to make one of his dream projects come true. My assistance was borne out of a deep affection and love. I knew he saw me only as a friend so I did not expect him to reciprocate. I did favors and walked the extra mile for him because I believed it was the right thing to do. As a friend. And as a human being. I saw firsthand how he agonized over this big life challenge, and concluded that it was not good to leave him at his most vulnerable.

“Pero hindi ka man niya lang hinahatid,” a female friend pointed out to me.

Maybe it was a just a matter of time that my guy friend and I would have a falling out. I couldn’t handle seeing him getting close to his special girl, so I upped and left.

Later, he explained to a common friend that he refrained from driving me home because doing so would only raise my hopes. Had he told me that, I would have replied, “I’m not asking you to love me back. I just wish you’d drive me home once in a while.”

In any case, my “hatid” issues were resolved in 2013 when I finally got my driver’s license. To me that plastic card is not just a symbol of independence for I could now comfortably go to where I please without relying on others. More important, the license has become my access to be kinder, nicer, and more considerate to others. I certainly know and appreciate how a simple offer to drive can go a long, long way.
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